Lover of Life: The Tale of the Turkey...And so much more

I made our first turkey yesterday. I got a lot of suggestions, but I was nervous. All I have to say is I think this experience would have turned out a lot better if the company would have put the weight on the turkey....just sayin'...

I ended up using the recipe from my Williams and Sonoma cookbook. It seemed to be the easiest for my first time.

I ran into a brief blonde moment when I say this plastic thing inside. I wasn't sure what it was. Was I supposed to take it out or not???? I came to my senses and realized that I must just have to take it out, because I feared it would melt and then John and I would get some kind of poisoning....just sayin'.

So.... after taking out the giblets and the neck(which I have to say was probably the most disgusting part), I gave the turkey a nice massage of butter and a little bit of oil, along with seasoning salt. Inside I stuffed him (or her) with onions and fresh sage. I put him in the roasting pan on top on a boat load of onions. I preceded to cover the breast with foil and stick him in the oven at 325.

My intention was to keep him in for 4 hours. John and I were trying to guesstimate the weight of the bird. At one point, John had a ten pound dumbell in one hand and the turkey in the other. True story. So... we were thinking that maybe Mr. Turkey was around 11 pounds. Four hours later, we took the turkey out of the oven, and let it sit for about ten. Then we cut into it. Oh... and I forgot to mention that we found out our meat thermometer doesn't work. (This would be a great stocking stuffer mom).

I had another blonde moment using the thermometer. I didn't know the actual thermometer was in a protective case, so I was sticking the thermometer with the protective case into the turkey. I was getting frustrated when it would only register 80 degrees. I just couldn't understand how this could be since the turkey was roasting for 4 HOURS!! John saw me stick the thermometer into the turkey and said, "Please don't tell me you have been sticking the thermometer in like that." He then explained that there was a casing over the actually thermometer.
Oh.

It turns out though that the thermometer was busted.

So, at four and a half hours, we took the turkey out. John cut into it and it was pink. I had also noticed blood coming out. I didn't think that was normal. John googled, yes googled, turkey blood and came back to report that all juices should be clear. So we put theturkey back in the oven for another 45 minutes.... still pink. ANother 45 minutes passed.... by this time we ate our baked potatoes. Then I said, "If the turkey isn't done this time, I am just going to settle for potaotes and apple pie."

My friends, that is EXACTLY what happened.

Baked potaotes and apple pie.

By the time the turkey was done, we were tired. John cut it up, and we just put it in the refrigerator. He then went to our wooded backyard and threw the rest of the turkey as far as the eye could see for our furry friends to enjoy.

The good thing that came out of this whole experience: While John and I were waiting for the turkey to be done for the third time, we sat on the couch and reminisced about our season of dating. It was super sweet.